Monday, 31 August 2009

Worst tackle of the season. Already.

Warning: Not for the squeamish. Urgh.

In the match between Anderlecht and Standard Liege last weekend came a tackle comparable to that of Eduardo's in the general horror of it. The unfortunate Marcin Wasilewski was fouled by Axel Witsel resulting in a horrible sounding open double leg fracture.

For those who were sick enough to want to watch it (like me) here's a gif of it: Here it is.

Wednesday, 19 August 2009

The Best Ever Football Kits?

We've all seen the new Newcastle United away kit, unfortuately (sorry Newcastle fans), and after seeing this I decided to do some research into the worst football kits of all time.

After little more than five minutes I found a couple of absolute gems, courtesy of the Mexico national football team. Two shirts that I couldn't believe were on lists of the worst ever to be made.

If we're honest, some of the clothes around in the 1990's were hideous, as were some of the football shirts, but Mexico got it absolutely right when they were designing their goalkeeper's kit for the 1994 USA World Cup.

The two kits, with the second (below) being from 1996 look like something Will Smith might have worn in the Fresh Prince of Bel Air, which means that they are so incredibly rubbish that they have become brilliant!

Why are we being made to look at horrible yellow Newcastle kits when we have been shown such wonderful examples of what kit designers can do? I demand that we see more kits like these, whose with me? No?

Thursday, 13 August 2009

Woman on a toilet.. yes. You heard me.

Some people have been known to watch the Football League. As a Manchester United fan in my own bubble of trophies, glory and ignoring the fact that 17 year old footballers have more money now than I will ever have in my life - I am unaware of it. The BBC though, is not. Neither is this woman, I assume, as she is filmed doing what needs must.

I hear some people get kicks out of that stuff.

Sunday, 9 August 2009

Oldie But a Goody

You've probably already seen it but for those who have not, this is much better than actual football. Binoculars + Football = Gold.

Wednesday, 5 August 2009

The Genius of James Richardson

There were many great reasons to be growing up in the early 90's. Power Rangers was at it's best, Playing Super Nintendo was the way to spend weekends and Football Italia was on Channel 4. The best part about Football Italia was it's presenter - James Richardson. Since then I've been a huge fan of him and his wondrous puns. Hopefully after Setanta's collapse ESPN will pick him up. Still here's my little tribute to "AC Jimbo" with some of his best puns:

"What do Clarence Seedorf and Pete Doherty have in common? They both get caught in possession an awful lot."

"Would Sven be partial to a role behind the desk? Stop sniggering at the back!"

"Chelsea paid a levy for the Shevy but the Shevy went dry."

"It hasn't been an amazing first half. Quite frankly, i've seen better finishing from the builders of Wembley Stadium."

"And he made off with more speed than a Scottish raver."

"Inter striker Alvaro Recoba set to become the club's highest paid player, so it's not just Ronaldo who's got big bucks."

"Inter fans have, like a man eating a milipede, tasted defeat many times."

"The goals in this game have, like a horny baker, came in a roll."

"Roma are like Channel Five; they are just not the same without Totti."

"The Brazilian defender once spent six months in a Sao Paolo jail. Lazio are keen, given how much he knows about keeping it tight at the back."

"Like George W. Bush with a model plane kit, you'll be glued to the box."

"This week Serie A has been responsible for more dope producing than Dr Dre."

"Liverpool with a score straight out of Posh Spice's diary: 8-nothing"

"Ince's hard tackle on fresh young Totti."

"Stock in Spanish dermatologists have went through the roof with the news that Antonio Cassano is set to join Real Madrid."

"Jimmy Bullard - like a bottle of poppers - will be trying to keep the Cottagers up."

"Fans couldn't be more on the edge of their seat if they'd just spent an afternoon with Max Mosley."

"Stephen Ireland, a man who's had more stiff nans than a dodgy indian restaurant."

"It's hard hitting and across two legs. No, it's not Craig Bellamy's golf club, it's the Champions League semi-finals."

"He tried to escape by car but was spotted waiting at red traffic lights; the fans instantly recognising the foreigner!"

"It you can't exchange bodily fluids- what's the point in having Cesc?"

"The most excitement seen at a live match appearance since I worked at a gunpowder factory."

"Today's podcast is more packed than the boxes on my desk at Setanta."

There used to be a Wikiquote page dedicated to his genius, but it has sadly been deleted. Curse you wikimods, you wikheads.

Ah, copy and pasting. The fast track way to becoming a blogger. Stay tuned later for The Genius of Ray Hudson.

The I, Robot of Football Strips

The advertising business is no way near as cool as is portrayed in the superb show, Mad Men. This is something you will not see on Mad Men.

This is Mjällby AIF's fantasic looking new strip. Or is it? I don't know because all I can see are adverts. Also, why is it modelled by a 8 year old?

Rui Patricio scores for Sporting?

In last nights Champions League qualifier for clubs who will rarely get past the group stages Sporting Club de Portugal beat Schteve McClaren's FC Twente with what could possibly well be a goal attributed to Sporting's goalkeeper, Rui Patricio. Or was it an own goal?

Either way, this is clear proof that goalkeepers should come up for corners more often. Not even if the team or losing or if it's in any way important, it's just damn entertaining.


So here's my new football blog. Yes, another one. This time though instead of focusing solely on Manchester United I'll be covering all of football. In my usual way.

Enjoy, if you can.